September 7, 2010

Self Help Reading

I've been doing a bit of reading lately. Visiting and revisiting some classics from the past. It started with a few heated discussions that ended with quite a few humble apologies. (really, it was getting comical how ridiculous I was being and how often I had to call J to apologize for my unreasonable outburst.) So I picked up one of the two marriage books on the shelf. These books often have great information that I try to incorporate in my interactions with Jesse. But mostly I love reading about the dysfunctional couples. The guys make J look so good and our problems so minor.

I've also been reading some YA fiction like Little Women and the prequels to Little House on the Prairie. I didn't realize how long it had been until I realized that I was more sympathetic to Marmee than to Jo. Here's what I learned:
-Marmee advocated for her children at school, taking them out when it was too stressful, or when the teacher used corporal punishment.
-Marmee was super affectionate and her children knew that she loved them dearly.
-She let her children make mistakes and take risks.
-When her daughters had problems, they almost always came to her for help.
After reading Little Women, I must say I was a lot more patient for a day or two, and really appreciated my girls.

The Little House books have gotten me parenting another way. You remember how Ma could always get the kids to do something, just by a look? They would stop fighting or complaining, start minding their manners from just a glance. I want that power! I don't want the kids to be scared of me, but that respect would be AWESOME! I've been putting G in time out left and right because of her sass and disrespect. It had been bugging me for awhile, but now I'm ready to do something about it.

Have you learned any good parenting skills lately? Do tell!


  1. I used to be the perfect parent before I had kids. Now, I know nothing and I rarely give advice except to my sister but mostly because to be annoying.

    Chris and I read the book "Between Husband and Wife" before we got married. It was o.k.

    Young Adult books are so good. I want Ma's power too. Baby Maria is super sassy. Right now it's cute but I know it'll start getting annoying really soon.

  2. i started reading _the parents we mean to be_ and i like it in theory ...i liked the dust jacket desctiption - but it's one of those books that feels like it's continual introduction - like i keep waiting for him to get to specifics. also, it seems more useful for people with kids older than 2 - like teenagers, and/or for parents who make 6 figures, went to an ivy league school, and feel lots of social pressure to be "successful" not me.

  3. i learned that four kids is my limit.
    i mean, i always thought it was, but now i KNOW it is!!

    I also learned that counting to three in a stern voice is almost as good as using the Imperious Curse. Only its not against Wizarding law to count to three.

    Taking time out to play every day, i mean really play, run as fast as you can barefoot in the grass, jump in puddles or piles of leaves, and make snow angels even if there isn't any snow.

    after having had four kids in seven years, and losing my energy and part of my brain somewhere along the way, this is what I learned are some of the most important things to remember about parenting.

    love you and miss you!

  4. What marriage books are they? I've also been thinknig I need some help with my parenting. Or at least a change in my approach. I've read parts of Parenting with Love and Logic and plan to revisit it (library wanted it back). Let us know if you find anything good.

  5. Amaya lives in time out lately. She is SO disrespectful. If you find something that works, let me know.


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